MOST DEFINITELY THE WORST HARDCORE / METALCORE / GRINDCORE BLOGSPOT ON THE NET

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VOTE WEBMASTER FOR PRESIDENT 2012 (SO THAT FILTHY HALF-BREEF NEGROID HAS NO CHANCE OF RUNNING THE SECOND TERM ONLY TO RISK HIMSELF FROM BEING TORCHED ON A BURNING KKKROSS)!







THE TRANSCENDANCE TO A PINK LAYOUT IS THE FINAL MANIFESTATION OF MY EXTREME HOMOSEXUALITY I'VE WORKED SO HARD TO REPRESS ENTIRELY THROUGHOUT MY MISERABLY CONFUSED LIFE! I CAN'T HIDE THIS MY BLATANT HORMONES ANY LONGER! PLEASE FUCK ME WITH YOUR AIDS STICK YOU HOLY FUCKING FAGGOTS?

DISCLAIMER: IN ORDER TO FIT IN WITH EVERY OTHER HALF-ASSED LAW-ABIDING PUSSY-ASS ALBUM BLOGS OUT ON THE NET, I WILL HAVE TO REMIND ALL YOU PARANOID SCHIZOPHRENICS THAT I DO NOT HOST ANYTHING ON THIS WEBSITE BUT MERELY REDIRECT YOU TO LINKS OF RIPPED ALBUMS THAT SOMEHOW MIRACULOUSLY PRE-EXISTED ON THE INTERNET DUE TO STRANGE FORCES OF NATURE. PIRATE THESE ALBUMS AT YOUR OWN CONSEQUENTIAL RISKS YOU FUCKING COWARDLY METALHEAD FAGGOTS.

(BOOKMARK THIS SITE SO YOUR OBESELY UNEMPLOYED MOTHER REALIZES THE BULLSHIT YOU'VE BEEN JERKING OFF TO WITH HER INTERNET BILLS)


TOTALLY ANONYMOUS AND ABSOLUTELY NO REGISTRATION REQUIRED!

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

THE SAWTOOTH GRIN - PERVAVOR

Brief Review:

NOW I AM NOT SUGGESTING OR TRYING TO COME OFF AS IF I'M SOME WISELY SKILLED MUSICIAN (NOR DO I REALLY KNOW MUCH ABOUT MUSIC IN FACT), BUT I DO THINK I KNOW THIS ONE THING ABOUT THE PROGRESSION OF A BAND IN RELATION TO ITS MUSIC: THAT IS, MUSICIANS TEND TO MATURE OVERTIME AND THEIR COMPOSITIONS REFLECT THEIR GRADUAL DEVELOPMENT OF SKILLS AND WHATNOT. TOUCHE, NO?

WELL NOW LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, INTRODUCING THE SAWTOOTH GRIN'S SECOND ALBUM... SOMETHING THAT COMPLETELY OBLITERATES THIS THEORY! WITH THEIR THREE SONG DEMO AFTER A FULL LENGTH, I THINK THEY MIGHT HAVE FINALLY OVERDOSED ON ALL THE CRACK THEY'VE BEEN SMOKING THROUGH THAT LARGE PIPE OF THEIRS BEFORE THE FULL ALBUM COULD POSSIBLY BE FINISHED! HOLY CRAP. THIS SHIT IS SO INCOHERENT AND DISASTEROUS THAT IT'S ACTUALLY GOOD. IN FACT, HERE'S THEIR COMPOSITION PROCESS:

1. VOCALIST TIES HIMSELF AGAINST THE WALL WITH A SPEAKERPHONE ATTACHED TO HIS FACE.

2. GUITARIST SHARPENS HIS GUITAR INTO AN AXE.

3. GUITARIST SWINGS HIS SHARPENED GUITAR AGAINST THE VOCALIST, BREAKING EACH AND EVERY LIMB WHILE THE COMPUTER RECORDS THE SQUEALING.

4. THE DRUMMER TAKES DOUBLE BASS PEDAL AND RAPIDLY PROLIFERATES IT AGAINST THE GUITARIST'S BALLSACK.

5. THE BASSIST SENDS THE DEMO TO SOME LABEL, SELLS EACH CD FOR $3, TAKES THE $9 PROFIT HE'S EARNED FROM HIS ENTIRE MUSICAL CAREER AND MOVES TO HAWAII AND HOOLA HOOPS IN GRASS SKIRTS.

6. ALBUM LEAKS ON THE NET AND GETS RIDICULED BY JEALOUS GUYS LIKE ME, WHO WANKS OFF TO THE THOUGHT OF THESE NIGHTLY RITUALS.

OKAY GOTTA GO, TIME TO MASTURBATE FUROCIOUSLY TO THIS ORGASMIC CHAOS. BRB, JUST MYSPACE ME. KTHX.

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