MOST DEFINITELY THE WORST HARDCORE / METALCORE / GRINDCORE BLOGSPOT ON THE NET

HTTP://WWW.DEADONTHEDANCEFLOOR.COM
HTTP://DEADONTHEDANCEFLOOR.BLOGSPOT.COM

VOTE WEBMASTER FOR PRESIDENT 2012 (SO THAT FILTHY HALF-BREEF NEGROID HAS NO CHANCE OF RUNNING THE SECOND TERM ONLY TO RISK HIMSELF FROM BEING TORCHED ON A BURNING KKKROSS)!





THE TRANSCENDENCE TO A PINK LAYOUT IS THE FINAL MANIFESTATION OF MY EXTREME HOMOSEXUALITY I'VE WORKED SO HARD TO REPRESS ENTIRELY THROUGHOUT MY MISERABLY CONFUSED LIFE! I CAN'T HIDE THIS MY BLATANT HORMONES ANY LONGER! PLEASE FUCK ME WITH YOUR AIDS STICK YOU HOLY FUCKING FAGGOTS?

DISCLAIMER: IN ORDER TO FIT IN WITH EVERY OTHER HALF-ASSED LAW-ABIDING PUSSY-ASS ALBUM BLOGS OUT ON THE NET, I WILL HAVE TO REMIND ALL YOU PARANOID SCHIZOPHRENICS THAT I DO NOT HOST ANYTHING ON THIS WEBSITE BUT MERELY REDIRECT YOU TO LINKS OF RIPPED ALBUMS THAT SOMEHOW MIRACULOUSLY PRE-EXISTED ON THE INTERNET DUE TO STRANGE FORCES OF NATURE. PIRATE THESE ALBUMS AT YOUR OWN CONSEQUENTIAL RISKS YOU FUCKING COWARDLY METALHEAD FAGGOTS.

(BOOKMARK THIS SITE SO YOUR OBESELY UNEMPLOYED MOTHER REALIZES THE BULLSHIT YOU'VE BEEN JERKING OFF TO WITH HER INTERNET BILLS)


TOTALLY ANONYMOUS AND ABSOLUTELY NO REGISTRATION REQUIRED!

Showing posts with label EMMURE. Show all posts
Showing posts with label EMMURE. Show all posts

Thursday, February 3, 2011

EMMURE - FELONY

1. "Sunday Bacon"   2:37
2. "I Thought You Met Telly And Turned Me Into Casper"   2:53
3. "I<3 EC2"   2:45
4. "Felony"   2:47
5. "You Sunk My Battleship"   3:09
6. "The Philosophy Of Time Travel"   2:36
7. "First Impressions"   2:18
8. "R2deepthroat"   2:17
9. "Bars In Astoria"   3:28
10. "Lesson From Nichole"   2:26
11. "Don't Be One"   2:55
12. "Immaculate Misconception"   1:26


BRIEF REVIEW:

I SWEAR I LISTENED TO THIS ALBUM AND FUCKING CRIED MYSELF INTO A LONG PERPETUAL SLEEP WHICH I'VE YET TO WAKE UP FROM. PERHAPS THAT WOULDN'T BE SO BAD BECAUSE I STILL WISH THIS IS NOTHING BUT A HORRIBLE DREAM WHICH THE DEFINITION OF NIGHTMARE CANNOT DO JUSTICE IN DESCRIBING. I REMEMBER WHEN I WAS YOUNGER AND ACTUALLY ENJOYED ATTENDING SHOWS AND GOTTEN MY HEAD STOMPED INTO MY NECK BY SCRAWNY LITTLE SCENE KIDS, AS WELL AS URINATING ALL OVER THE DANCE FLOOR SO PEOPLE WOULD SLIP WHILE ATTEMPTING ROUNDHOUSES INTO EACH OTHER'S DEFORMED GROIN AREAS. THOSE WERE THE DAYS  WELL SPENT, ESPECIALLY AFTER WHEN I GOT DISHONOURABLY DISCHARGED FROM THE ARMY FOR ARBITRARILY SHOOTING HIDEOUS RAGHEADED WOMEN IN THICK TURBANS IN THE MIDDLE EAST. BUT NOPE, HARDCORE SCENE HAS NEVER BEEN THE SAME AGAIN. ALL I SEE NOWADAYS ARE FUCKING SEVENTY-FIVE POUND SUBURBAN SCENE WIGGERS IN COLLEGE FONT WRITINGS THROWING DOWN IN GRILLZ IN OBNOXIOUS COLLEGE FONT T-SHIRTS WHILE NASTY FAT-ASS METALHEADS CHARGE AT THEM LIKE MERCILESS RHINO'S ON STEROID. I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING TO HARDCORE. I AM SIMPLY AN OLD-FAG THAT HAS AN AVERSION TO CHANGE. ESPECIALLY TOWARDS A BAND THAT NEEDS TO PULL OUT A BRASS KNUCKLE TO BEAT UP SOME FAGGOT LIKE VINCENT BENNET IN A FAGGOT SHOWDOWN AT A NEW YORK SHOW. THIS NU-METALCORE CLOWNSHOE FAGGOTRY NEEDS TO END TODAY. I AM GOING TO SHIT A NUKE IN ONE OF THESE VENUE'S TOILET ONE DAY AND WATCH IT BLOW UP DURING THE HEAVIEST BASS-DROP TO ONE OF THEIR 30,232,324,323,231,231,253 BREAKDOWNS THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE ALBUM. PROBLEM SOLVED! HOLY SHIT I AM SUCH A GENIUS... HIROSHIMA MUST BE PROUD.

I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS FRANKIE PALMERI CHARACTER FROM THIS FAGGOT BAND. HE STATES THAT HE CRIES TO THE BAYSIDE CD EVERY SINGLE NIGHT BECAUSE HIS EX-GIRLFRIEND ABORTED WHAT WOULD'VE BEEN THE UNFATHOMABLE PRODUCT OF HIS SEMEN. YEAH, BECAUSE THAT'S JUST WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS: A BUNCH OF TINY FRANKIE PALMERI'S RUNNING AROUND THUGGIN' AROUND AND MUGGING PEOPLE WITH BRASS KNUCKLES AND EXTENDOS AND THREATENING VICTIMS IN INCOHERENT SCREAMING DIALECTS TAUGHT BY THEIR FAT DOUCHEBAG FATHER. I BET THEIR FIRST WORDS WERE SOMETHING INTELLIGENT AND MEANINGFUL, LIKE BREE BREE ORRH ORRH YOU FUCKING LOSERS. MAYBE THOSE WERE THE FIRST AND THE LAST WORDS CONSIDERING IT WAS THE ONLY THING AUDIBLY EMITTED DURING THE FETUSES' ILLEGAL ABORTION! BAHAHAHAHAHA.

I DON'T GET WHAT THESE HARDCORE WIGGERS HAVE TO BE SO ANGRY ABOUT ALL THEIR LIVES. I MEAN YOUR INABILITY TO COMPLETE GRADE TEN MUST BE A SEVERE HANDICAP TO OBTAINING QUALITY EMPLOYMENT, BUT I HEAR THEY HAVE GOVERNMENT-SUBSIDIZED PROGRAMS FOR LEGAL RETARDS LIKE YOURSELVES. YOU KNOW, ONES THAT DON'T INVOLVE MAKING DISGUSTING NOISES PLAYED IN YOUR GRANDPARENTS' BASEMENT WHILE THEY GAWK AT YOU IN AN CARDIAC ARREST. YOU HEARTLESS BASTARDS THEN USE THE INHERITANCE MONEY TO FUND YOUR LITTLE PATHETIC TOURS WHERE FOURTEEN YEAR OLD SCENE BITTIES ARE ILLEGALLY MOLESTED IN THE BACK OF YOUR TOUR BUSES. I KNOW THIS BECAUSE I SIMPLY CANNOT COME UP WITH ANOTHER RATIONALE AS TO WHAT WOULD MAKE YOUR PATHETIC TOURS WORTH IT. IF ONLY I CAN ALSO GET PAID FOR PLAYING NOTHING BUT THE OPEN CHORD FOR AN HOUR A DAY, TWO ALBUMS AN HOUR, EIGHT TRACKS PER ALBUM AND INFINITE FAGGOT PER TRACK THEN MY LIFE WOULD BE MADE AS WELL. I KNOW WE ALL LOVE HIGH ACHIEVERS: IN THIS DAY AND AGE PEOPLE WHILE PEOPLE HEAVILY COMPETE AND STRIVE TO HOLD PRESTIGIOUSLY HONOURABLE TITLES LIKE BEING DOCTORS AND LAWYERS, THESE FUCKIN PRANCING ANIMALS MAKE A LIVING OFF PALM-MUTING THE OPEN CHORD TWENTY-FOUR HOURS A DAY. I BET YOUR PARENTS ARE SO PROUD OF YOU THEY INSTANTLY COMMITTED SUICIDE YOU FAGGOTS. BUT AT LEAST IT WOULD BE YOUR PARENTS WHO KILLED THEMSELVES, AND NOT YOUR KIDS BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T END UP BEING CONCEIVED!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I LOVE TALKING SHIT OVER THE SAFETY OF THE INTERNET JUST A LITTLE TOO MUCH. I BET FRANKIE WOULD SMASH MY FAGGOT FACE INTO A PULP IN REAL LIFE WITHOUT A SECOND OF PAUSE.

EMMURE IS ONE OF THESE BANDS THAT NO MATTER HOW BADLY KIDS SHIT TALK ABOUT THEM, THEY STILL ATTEND THEIR SHOWS AND MOSH THE HARDEST EVERY TIME THEY COME INTO TOWN. THE SHEER HYPOCRISY OF THIS IS ASTOUNDING. EVERY TIME I PAY THIRTY DOLLARS TO SEE THIS FAGGOT BAND I GET KICKED IN MY FAT BOUNCY MAN TITS. I THEN SHIT MY PANTS AND SMEAR THE LIQUIDY RESIDUES IN MY BOXERS ALL OVER PEOPLE'S FACES. HOW DO YOU LIKE EXPERIENCING EMMURE WITH MANURE  NOW YOU FUCKING FAGGOTS?!

FUCK ME UP THE BUM PLEASE AND LISTEN TO MY SQUIRT OUT FARTS TO THE RHYTHMIC PATTERNS OF YOUR DROP-A BREAKDOWNS WOOHOO

Monday, February 2, 2009

EMMURE - GOODBYE TO THE GALLOWS

1. Ticket For the Paralyzer, A
2. 10 Signs You Should Leave
3. When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong
4. Rusted Over Wet Dreams
5. You Got a Henna Tattoo That Said Forever
6. Travis Bickle
7. Sleeping Princess in Devil's Castle
8. Key to Keeping the Show Fresh Is...I'm Dead, The
9. It's Not Just a Party, It's a Funeral
10. When Everything Goes Wrong Take the Easy Way Out


Brief Review:

I FUCKING LOVE THE BRILLIANT DEDUCTIVE LOGIC OF MAJORITY OF YOU FAGGOT METALHEAD WHO HAS HALF THE AUDACITY TO CRITIQUE MY WEBSITE... BECAUSE THE SHEER INTELLIGENCE POSSESSED BY YOUR BIOLOGICAL SUPERIORITY WILL NEVER CEASE TO AMAZE ME. IT USUALLY GOES SOMETHING ALONG THE UNFATHOMABLY INGENIOUS LINES OF THIS...

"HMM, I KNOW! *WHILE SCRATCHING YOUR GIFTED BABOON HEAD* ... IF THIS GUY SITS ON HIS FAT UNSANITIZED ASS ALL DAY AND RIDICULES METALHEADS FOR HOW PATHETIC THEY ARE, THEN HE MUST BE A SILLY DRAPE-HAIRED EMO KID!"

YEAH, JACKPOT, DEXTER! WOULD YOU LIKE TO TAKE "YOU'RE A VIRGIN" FOR $400 YOU FUCKING PATHETIC SORE LOSER? IF I MUST BE ANYONE WHO POTENTIALLY HATES A METALHEAD, THEN I MUST BE ALL OF THE FOLLOWING:
  • NIGGERS
  • SAND NIGGERS
  • APES AND MONKEYS
  • JEWS
  • WETBACKS
  • ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS
  • TEACHERS
  • STONERS
  • COOL PEOPLE
  • HOOKERS AND PROSTITUTES
  • HOMOSEXUALS
  • HETEROSEXUALS
  • YOUR OWN MOTHER
  • YOUR OWN FATHER
  • THE OTHER HALF OF YOUR SPLIT PERSONALITY WHERE YOU LIVE YOUR SECRET LIFE AS "AUNT OLGA" AS A TRANSGENDERED NIGHTRIDER
  • ANYONE WITH THE POTENTIAL OF SUCCESS
  • ANYONE WITH THE POTENTIAL OF BEING LIKED
I LOVE HOW YOU STUPID KIDS ANXIOUSLY SIT IN FRONT OF MY SITE WHILE COMPULSIVELY BASHING F5 ALL DAY IN THE DESPERATE ANTICIPATION OF A NEW UPDATE. NOBODY LIKES YOU FILTHY, OBNOXIOUS AND PRETENTIOUS ASSHOLES! HOLY SHIT, IF YOU LOWLIVES WEREN'T JUST SO INSIGNIFICANT THAT YOU ACTUALLY WARRANTED DARWIN'S AWARENESS WHEN HE DREW THE EVOLUTIONARY DIAGRAM, THERE MIGHT JUST BE A PLACE FOR YOU ON THE DIAGRAM... MAYBE SOMEWHERE BELOW THE SEA PLANKTONS OR SOMETHING. LEAST PLANTS ARE ABLE TO AUTOPRODUCE FOOD VIA PHOTOSYNTHESIS... WHAT ARE YOU FAGGOTS CAPABLE OF DOING? NOTHING BUT DEVOURING FOOD TO CONTRIBUTE TO YOUR FRIGHTENING OBESITY WHICH YOU TAKE COMFORT IN KNOWING YOU'LL EVENTUALLY BURN AT AN ATROCIOUS METAL SHOW. CHILL OUT ON YOUR HEAVY DIETARY MEASURES, WILL YOU? AFRICA IS STILL STARVING... IT'S A FUCKING WONDER WHY NIGGERS WERE THE FIRST ONE ON THAT LIST. GO FUCKING FIGURE.

YOU DILDOS TEND TO LIKE TO BELIEVE YOU'RE SOME SORT OF ELITE COLLECTIVE. THIS TYPE OF DELUSION TEND TO OVERSHADOW THE REALITY OF THE FACT THAT YOU'RE ALL NOTHING BUT A BUNCH OF FAT, HIDEOUS FUCKING SOCIALLY INEPT LOSERS WHO HAVE NEVER FELT THE MOISTURE OF A VAGINAL CONCAVE THROUGHOUT YOUR ENTIRE HIGH SCHOOL LIFE. GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY SITE, YOU'RE WASTING MY BANDWIDTH WITH YOUR SLOW, LAGGING COMPUTER THAT IS TAKINGA DIARRHEA ON MY ALLOCATED WEBSPACE. GO INTERPRET AND ACT UPON YOUR FUCKING PATHETIC DEATH METAL LYRICS ON A LITERAL LEVEL AND START PERFORMING ITS VIOLENT, SELF-DESTRUCTIVE DEPICTIONS YOU SORRY ANIMALS. THAT'S ASSUMING IF YOU'VE EVOLUTIONARILY REACHED THE TOOL AGE TO BE CAPABLE OF ENDING YOUR FAGGOT LIVES THE RIGHT WAY YOU FUCKING FAGGOTS.

...AND DON'T FORGET TO HEADBANG AND TWIRL AROUND YOUR SIXTEEN INCH HAIR LIKE A FAGGOT! HERE COMES THE BLASTBEATS! GET SOME RHYTHM YOU DEAF CASES, CAN'T YOU DO ANYTHING RIGHT?

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Emmure - The complete guide to needlework

1. Second Hand Smoke - (instrumental)
2. Johnny Carson Didn't Have to Die
3. Looking a Gift Horse in the Mouth
4. I Should Have Called Ms. Cleo
5. Exits Away
6. Fist Fight With Dick Tracy, A


BRIEF REVIEW:

TOUGH GUY HARDCORE THAT WILL FUCKING DISSECT YOUR SYSTEM OF GUTS INTO TWO SYMMETRICAL COUNTERPARTS, WITH THE ATTACK OF A SINGLE SPINKICK! YOU FUCKING SCRAWNY, WEAK, COWARDLY WIMPS. I CAN SEE MOST OF YOU METALHEADS ARE FUCKING SCARED AND IT SHOWS RIGHT THROUGH. I DON'T GIVE A LIVING FUCK HOW MANY POSER FRIENDS YOU KNOW FROM YOUR LOCAL METAL ONLINE FORUMS, YOU STILL LOOK LIKE A BUNCH OF SOCIALLY INEPT ASSCLOWNS LOCKED IN A FUCKING CAGE AND ATTEMPTING TO BREAK FREE AT METAL SHOWS. YOU ARE A BUNCH OF BARBARIC SOLDIERS FROM THE STONE AGE, TRYING TO EXERT PHYSICAL FORCE ONTO EACH OTHER IN THE ACT OF INTIMIDATING PEOPLE FROM STEALING YOUR GEOGRAPHIC TERRITORY - OTHERWISE KNOWN AS PUSH MOSHING. SERIOUSLY, I HAVE TO SAY THIS...

THE METAL CULTURE (AND THE LACK THEREOF), IS ONE OF THE SADDEST, AND MOST PATHETIC FUCKING CONFORMITY FULL OF THE MOST PITIFUL, NASTY AND UGLY SOCIALLY OUTCASTED FOOLS I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE.

COME ON, I'VE SEEN ROADKILLS MORE WORTHY THAN MOST OF YOU SAD FUCKS. WHY DON'T YOU DO SOMETHING PRODUCTIVE WITH YOUR LIVES FOR ONCE, LIKE ENDING IT? NOBODY WOULD SHED A TEAR, AND FOR GOD'S SAKES YOU MIGHT JUST INSPIRE ANOTHER SWEDISH SYMPHONIC BLACK METAL BAND TO RISE FROM THEIR COCOONS, WAILING ABOUT A BUNCH OF HORRID FUNERAL CRAP NOBODY LIKES TO HEAR WHEN THEY'RE ALIVE. SPEAKING OF WHICH, WHAT THE HELL IS "FUNERAL DOOM" ANYWAYS? IS THAT SERIOUSLY A GENRE PLAYED AND ENJOYED BY LIVING PEOPLE?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HOLY SHIT I AM LAUGHING SO HARD THAT MY BOWEL HURTS.