Friday, May 8, 2009
AS I LAY DYING - FRAIL WORDS COLLAPSE
BRIEF REVIEW:
AS I'M SIFTING THROUGH THE REVIEWS I WROTE THROUGHOUT THE YEARS BEFORE THIS ONE, GOD, OH MY GOD THE HORRENDOUSNESS OF IT ALL. THEY SUCK SO FUCKING MUCH. I WONDER HOW MOST OF YOU DEDICATED FOLLOWERS MANAGE TO DEVOTE YOURSELVES TO THE CONTINUOUS GARBAGE UPDATES ON MY FUCKING BLOG. WHAT A WASTE OF SPACE ON THE CYBER-WORLD. WHAT A BUNCH OF CROCK. DO YOU FUCKING FAGGOTS HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO WITH YOUR GODDAMN TIME? GO RIDE A BIKE THROUGH A CITY PARK OR SOMETHING YOU DUMBASSES. STOP CROWDING IN FRONT OF YOUR CUM-STAINED MONITOR SCREENS. GO TAKE A SHOWER TO STERILIZE THE PUTRID SMELL FROM YOUR JUNGLE ARMPITS AND WHILE YOU'RE AT IT, PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD...
WIPE YOUR FUCKING ASSHOLES WHEN YOU'RE DONE TAKING A SHIT OF ALL THE LEFT-OVER BEANS YOU'VE VIGOROUSLY DEVOURED LAST NIGHT FROM YOUR ROOMMATE'S CABIN OF ANNUAL LEFTOVERS!
SERIOUSLY THOUGH, SOMETIMES I LOOK AT MY EROTIC PILE OF SHIT GET A HARD-ON. I WONDER HOW SOMETHING THAT EXCRETES OUT OF THE DEPTH OF MY BOWEL CAN POSSIBLY BE SO SEXY AND ELEGANT. SOME OF THEM EVEN WIGGLE AROUND LIKE THEY'RE LIVING SPECIES! WOW. BEING FASCINATED WITH THESE BIOLOGICAL ORGANISMS, I THEN STICK A STRAW RIGHT INTO THE UNFLUSHED TOILET BASIN AND SUCK IT RIGHT INTO MY SYSTEM FOR ECO-FRIENDLY RECYCLING.
DON'T HATE ME BECAUSE I AM GREEN
SO ON A LIGHTER NOTE, TODAY I TOOK A WALK AROUND THE PARK AND NOTICED SOMETHING FUNNY IN THE LAKE... A REFLECTION OF MY BIG, FAT, AND BALDINGLY UNAPPEALING VIRGIN SELF! IT WAS SO DISTURBINGLY GROTESQUE I HAD A FUCKING STROKE. AS THE PARAMEDICS REACHED THE SCENE, THEY LAUGHED SO HARD AT THE ABSURDITY OF MY PHYSICAL OBESITY THAT THEY PLAYED TRAMPOLINE ON MY STOMACH, WHICH THEY PROCEEDED TO TAKE A DUMP ON BEFORE LEAVING. I SWEAR TO GOD I DIED NINE TIMES THROUGHOUT THE PROCESS, HOLY CRAP. (AND THEN I WOKE UP AND REALIZED I'M NOT A CAT HEHEHEHEHE)
GO FUCK YOURSELF WITH A PATRIOTIC IRAQI FLAGPOLE
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I just signed up to your blogs rss feed. Will you post more on this subject?
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