2. Letting Go Would Be an End 4:03
3. The Quotidian Succession 3:47
4. Sifting Through These Ashes 5:03
5. Beauty Forgotten 1:13
6. Lament 3:06
7. Unsteady Docks Along the Ohio 3:12
8. Portrait 3:23
9. Three Months 1:20
10. Can One Possess Autumn? 5:22
11. Bonus Track 12:18
DUDE WENT TO A BUSINESS MEETING
WITH A POTENTIAL INVESTOR TODAY AND GOT HIT WITH SOME MAD STOMACH PAINS. HE WENT ABOUT THE SITUATION CORRECTLY AND
RELEASED INTO THE TOILET, BUT THERE WAS SOMETHING STRANGE ABOUT THE TOILET
THERE, IT WAS HIGHER OFF THE GROUND THAN NORMAL, LEAVING HIS FEET DANGLING.
HE
SAT UPON THE TOILET CONCENTRATING ON PUSHING OUT THE GOOEY LOG, BUT COULDN'T
QUITE TOUCH THE GROUND TO GIVE HIMSELF THE LAST OOMPH HE NEEDED IN HIS
TWIST TO GET THE LAST PIECE OFF. WIPING
PROVED TO BE A CHALLENGE TO, MAKING HIM LEAN AT AN UNCOMFORTABLE ANGLE, LEAVING
HIM PRONE AND DEFENSELESS TO ACCIDENTAL SLIPPAGE AND LOSING PRECIOUS MATERIAL
POSSESSIONS INTO THE STOOL COVERED ABYSS. HE STOOD UP, GLARED
INTO THE TOILET TO TAKE PRIDE IN HIS WORK, AND WIPED HIMSELF WHILE STANDING UP,
WHICH, AS SOME OF YOU KNOW, IS NOT THE OPTIMAL STANCE FOR WIPING. UNFORTUNATELY, HE MISSED A LARGE PORTION, AND CARRIED ON
WITH HIS DAY. HE ATTENDED THE MEETING SMEARING POOP ALL OVER THE INSIDE OF
HIS BOXERS, MAKING IT NEAR UNBEARABLE FOR THE MEETING TO CONTINUE WITHOUT
SINGLING OUT WHO THE PERPETUATOR IS AND ASKING HIM TO LEAVE. HIS REPUTATION WITH THE COMPANY, LIKE HIS UNDERWEAR, IS NOW
DEEPLY SOILED.
...AND LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, HENCE WHY WEBMASTER HAS BEEN UNEMPLOYED FOR DECADES ON END.
